Thank you for my thankless job

They say being a Mother is a thankless job. When all those well-meaning Mothers and Grandmothers are giving this unsolicited advice as you glow with the joy of expectation and pregnancy you only half listen. Sure, you hear them, but dont really believe it. It is when you are being hit in the face with strings of spaghetti from an angry, and apparently not hungry toddler, that the words come back and the "a-ha" moment takes place. Even then though that sleepy toddler half closes his eyes and smiles and sleepy smile and you are back. Thankless? I don't think so. That little "I wuv you, momma" is all I need. It is true. We may not get "Thank you's" for being Mommy but we know we are appreciated and loved.

However, I have the true thankless job: being a working Mother. I can truly say that my children and husband are thankful for my homemade cakes, hair brushing skills, and wonderful tickle monster performances. The thing is the moment I get a phone call or have to turn on my computer they all act like I have not spoken to them in days!

Maybe it is because I work from home or part time. If I had a full time job I drove too there would be less expected of me at home I am sure. I would also have the luxery of leaving the office at the office. That, however, is not the case. I work 20-30 hours a week, from home, on my own business. I also pick up the girls from school, handle any and all doctors appts (and with three kids there are plenty), and run the house. This means I am mentaling working a to do list from the moment I wake up to the moment I go to sleep. It is also means that no matter how hard I try to make school hours my main working hours that that is not always possible. I have to answer calls occasionaly and checking my email twice a day really helps me not miss a beat with clients. I cook dinner, sit down with the family, watch everyone play Wii for half an hour and then the moment I step away and open the laptop. . . KABOOM! The world is ending, my husband is giving that look, the kids immediately start mis-behaving. What in the world!!!!

I would like my family to recognize and be thankful for the fact that they did not have to go to daycare today afterschool, that the laundry is done, and those darn chicken fingers were made from scratch! I would like for my husband to be thankful that I am trying so hard to be the perfect Mom and make a significant contribution to the household. That, yes, it would be great if I could be completely tuned in ALL the time but to do that means I would need to give up working. Why cant these people see the big picture?

So Motherhood IS truly it's own reward but there is no appreciation, at least in my house, for being a working Mom. I am looking forward to the day my kids have kids, and they are working their tales off to be fantastic parents, and provide for them at the same time and they get their "a-ha" moment. I know my Mom sure gets a peaceful look on her face everytime I thank her, once again, for putting up with me when I was this age. Maybe by the time I am that old even my husband (of whom I am only mildy complaing because for the most part he is just about as perfect as he can get) will get some perspective. Only time will tell. Until then I guess I will continue to do things like write my blog at 9pm on Sunday Night when a basketball game is on and I cant possibly being doing something for anybody else. Me time. . . work time.

Working Mom- Balancing it all.

Thirty-one years old and still battling to find a balance between family and being a business owner. For so many years I’ve questioned my self-worth. Not that I didn’t think I was clever enough or capable, just whether I was sacrificing one thing to achieve another. Was it possible to become a successful business owner and to be a great mother?
I remember that my mother once told me, “You can only ever be GREAT at one thing, good at two, fair at three, and then it goes downhill.” It that was true, I was prepared to just be “good” at both career and being a mother.
Already blessed with an amazing daughter, who now is five, my husband and I wanted more. We suffered with two miscarriages after my daughter was born. It was hard and painful to say the least, but we managed through. We always considered how fortunate we are to have our daughter.
Three years since our last pregnancy and much time to forget, we found out a few weeks back that we were pregnant. The surprising thing was that we weren’t even trying. I was so excited and hopeful. A few very short days later we found out that it just didn’t work out.
I felt broken. It wasn’t this miscarriage that broke me, but the forgotten hopes and dreams of another child from three years back that came bubbling to the surface. However, through every heartache, something profound can be learned.
I realized that I’m truly happy with who I am as a person and more importantly who I am as a mother. My husband and I have picked ourselves back up and are now on a mission to get on the baby bus.
As for my career – well, can you ever have it all? I think so. I feel like I’ve found a balance between maintaining the career-driven aspects that help to fulfill me in my life while at the same time being able to pick up my daughter when school gets out. To me, it doesn’t get better than that.